Leeds Banter Archive September 09 2018
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09 Sep 2018 20:02:56
Hernandez is our new Strachan. Promotion this year followed by top four next year then Champions the following year! Ok been on the sauce but you never know.
I must curtail my drinking I think.
What's Ausmans excuse?
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09 Sep 2018 23:20:34
He's an Aussie. No more needs to be said.
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09 Sep 2018 23:51:19
Gotta drink here mate cause of the heat.
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10 Sep 2018 01:14:14
When does bush fire season start π₯.
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09 Sep 2018 17:24:04
joke. how do you get a nun pregnant? dress her up as an alter boy!
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09 Sep 2018 11:49:16
Jokes aside all but does anyone know if Birmingham or Villa are set to be docked points due to financial irregularities or is does this only happen if Leeds are involved.
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09 Sep 2018 13:56:52
What do you think white?
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09 Sep 2018 16:16:51
What do you think Aussie?
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09 Sep 2018 19:37:22
What do you think lucas.
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09 Sep 2018 20:15:27
What do you think Martyn.
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09 Sep 2018 23:21:46
Goodnight John Boy.
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10 Sep 2018 12:07:54
G'night Billy Joe Jim Bob.
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09 Sep 2018 10:05:49
Joke. came home and caught the plumber humping my dog. called the police who arrested him.
He was released after 20 minutes. asked the copper what was going on, he said we couldn't charge him because he's
Corgi registered.
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09 Sep 2018 16:16:16
His corgi registration is probably out of date and therefore operating illegally. He needs to be on the gas safe register. So you might have to find another plumber in the future. π€.
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09 Sep 2018 08:57:27
Joke time (bit long)
Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the bar counter with a great big smile on his face.
Dave says, "John, what are you so happy for".? "Well Dave, I got to tell ya. Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin' my boat, and a redhead came up to me. boobs out to here, Dave. boobs out to here! She says, Can I have a ride in your boat".? I said, "Sure you can have a ride in my boat". So I took her way out, Dave. I turned off the key and I said, "It's either screw or swim".
She couldn't swim, Dave. She couldn't swim".
The next day Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the bar counter with a bigger smile on his face. Dave says, "What are you happy about today John".?
"Well Dave. I got to tell ya. Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxing' my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blonde came up to me. boobs out to here, Dave. boobs out to here! She said, "Can I have a ride in your boat".? I told her 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat. ' So I took her way out, Dave. Way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I said, 'It's either screw or swim! ' She couldn't swim, Dave! She couldn't swim! "
A couple days pass and Dave walks into a bar and sees John down there crying' over a beer.
Dave says, "John, what are you so sad for".?
"Well Dave, I got to tell ya. Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxing' my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me. boobs WAY out to here, Dave. boobs WAY out to here. I had more wood than my boat does. She says, 'Can I have a ride in your boat? ' So I said, 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat. ' So I took her way out, Dave, way WAY out. much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at her boobs and said 'It's either screw or swim! ' She pulled down her pants and. " He paused and took a big gulp of beer. "She had a dick, Dave! She had this great BIG dick! and I can't swim Dave! I can't swim".
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09 Sep 2018 19:43:21
Is your name John by any chance Kray? π.
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09 Sep 2018 08:44:34
How do you circumsise a Millwall fan? Kick his sister in the jaw ππ€£ππ.
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09 Sep 2018 08:36:28
Why did God create orgasms? So women can moan even when they're happy.
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09 Sep 2018 01:47:33
Joke time Lucas
how can you spot a blindman in a nudist camp?
it ain't hard!
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09 Sep 2018 09:09:02
Thatβs your 5th best one yet Marty boy.
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09 Sep 2018 00:41:58
People say I'm indecisive i don't think i am do you?
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